Saying No to the Good Leaves Room for the Best

I missed the women’s breakfast again. Our church has a couple of women’s breakfasts every year. I often think it would be nice to go. There is some pressure, especially on younger women, to attend. I rarely do.

Last year I thought I would go to the Christmas breakfast, except that when I was reading about simplifying my holiday I decided to limit myself to one Christmas activity per weekend. That weekend I had promised my daughter we would bake Christmas cookies.

This most recent event coincides with the weekend my husband and I went away to a marriage conference to celebrate our 15th anniversary. I hadn’t had more than a single night away from my children for the last four years, so we considered this an investment in our marriage on all fronts.

I often berate myself for not being involved enough. I teach a creative writing to teenagers at my home school co-op. I serve in two church ministries. I home school my children. These are the things I feel called to right now. I support others causes with my money as I’m able. But I don’t volunteer in my community, and I don’t teach Sunday school. I still feel guilty.

But we literally can’t all do everything. Even if I wanted to I couldn’t serve in every church ministry, and on every community committee, nor give money to every cause.

This is because we are all supposed to contribute as we are able in each season of life. We probably could all benefit from a little less time watching Netflix but that doesn’t mean we have time to pick up another major responsibility.

Whenever there is another plea for Sunday school teachers or another church service need I feel deeply guilty and almost volunteer. Then I ask myself how and when I’m going to manage to plan lessons or even summon the energy on a Sunday morning.

My husband kindly reminds me of all that I am already doing. (At times, he also wishes I would do less, not more).

I need to be purposeful in choosing how I spent my time and energy. But that will still mean saying no to many good things in favor of what is best. Maybe not no forever, but for now.