How the Men in My Life Inspire Me: From a Daughter, Wife, and Sister-in-Law

I would like to be more like my dad. He doesn’t really care about stuff. He never has. He regularly gets mocked for shopping at Goodwill or wearing other people’s castoffs. He has pants older than I am. But he genuinely doesn’t care what people think of what he wears because his mind has always been on higher things. I like my house to be pretty and I enjoy clothes that are comfortable, fit me well, and make me feel good. I never know how much of this difference is gender, generational, or personality. But I know that I admire his heaven-mindedness.

I would like to be more like my husband. He is a think-first, act-second. He’s a muller and ruminator. He says less, so people listen when he talks. I tend to have a fast-moving brain that considers and then wants to act. This isn’t always a bad thing. One of the biggest strains between us for the last 20 years has been that I want to do something and he wants to wait and see. We tend to balance each other out in that area but not without some conflict along the way. Yet, I would like to be more like him, a better listener, and a deeper thinker.

Sometimes I wish I was more like my brother-in-law. I’ve known him as long as my husband, and he was my friend before he dated my sister. Now he’s the father of my four nephews and a leader in our church. He works hard and has learned to do things himself. He’s handy enough to renovate kitchens and bathrooms almost completely on his own. My sister dreams it up and he makes it happen. I admire the way he does things around the house without being asked and without complaining. He grew up without a dad and yet he has devoted his life to being the best husband and father he can be. The sacrificial and loving way he behaves in his family only carries over into the way he loves the people of God. I admire the way he takes care of those around him with such deep unselfishness that I struggle to cultivate in myself.

I can appreciate all that these great men are and see all that God has done in them and through them. I can aspire to the best in them while still honoring the best in myself. Because we’re all pointed in the same direction, to become more like Jesus.

I hope you’ll indulge my little late Father’s Day tribute. I didn’t realize that’s where I was going when I wrote it.