I don’t know what’s next.

At the beginning of 2023, we starting calling this our year of Jubilee. I turned forty this year, we celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary and we began the process of a major addition to our home. While we definitely faced some challenge and difficulty the whole year has felt like things were coming to fruition.

Then two months ago my husband lost his job. Almost four weeks ago he verbally accepted a new position and we breathed a grateful sigh of relief. But we’ve been waiting on a start date and it hasn’t come. Unemployment payments are backlogged and we may some sizeable bills to pay coming up soon.

We are waiting again to see what God will do.

When I order something online, I will often look to see if the item is available “in store” for local pick up. It’s incredibly frustrating to go to pick up an item I ordered only to find that the inventory was wrong and the item is not actually available.

We feel a bit like that right now. Except that God is not a vending machine and my prayers aren’t orders that have a guaranteed pick up time and place. But you know what I can count on? His presence, goodness and peace.

The great political deliverer did not arrive in Jerusalem wielding a sword. The king of heaven himself was born in the town of Bethlehem among unknown people amidst anonymous animals. The names of those who witnessed his birth are not recorded and even the shepherds are only identified by their occupation.

The Prince of Peace didn’t drive out the Romans or unite the factions, but he put himself into the middle of everything. He was present and he lived among the most common of people.

This Christmas won’t look like I was expecting. I feel like I’ve said that for so many years that I really should stop anticipating how Christmas will be. But I can be expectant that Immanuel is still as much with us today as he was over 2000 years ago. His presence, his goodness and his love, those I can lean on. He is still God with us, no matter what the future holds.

“A longing heart
A world on fire
We want to see your face again
No man can know
The day, the hour
The many miles from Bethlehem
But every knee will bow and bend
And every tongue confess again
Emmanuel
We breathe your name
We watch, we wait”
-Nicole Nordeman, We Watch, We Wait