So much of this year has been filled with disappointment for a lot of people. I have some lovely friends who have been wonderful at focusing on the positives in this grief-filled season. They post good-hearted memes about how in the future we’ll look back on this time as a positive and that we need to carefully evaluate how much of real life we let back in. Those are all good things. But there are some of us who can see the positive but are still grieving losses, of various kinds and difficulties.
The year that went from big plans and the beginning of a beautiful new phase of life became one of loneliness and financial instability. From finally having some time to invest in myself after ten years of full-time stay at home mothering and five years of full-time homeschooling to eight months of being trapped in my house with my kids almost 24/7.
I’ve had disappointment after disappointment and while I feel like I coped pretty well, I’m not immune to the feelings of loss and the grief that comes when life goes vastly differently from what you planned.
Job loss when debt-free living felt within our grasp. New emotional and mental struggles (in addition to the ones we already have) at a time when we are least able to treat and manage them.
For me, this is what that scripture in Romans 8:28 is talking about when it says
“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
This doesn’t mean we won’t experience loss but that somehow out of that loss, good will be produced.
We are finally being forced to deal with issues in our family unit that probably should have been addressed a long time ago. But quarantine was the pressure cooker we needed to force us to get outside help. (It also made it harder to get said help, but at least we’re finally moving forward in that area.)
I don’t think there is anything wrong or sinful about being disappointed, we just don’t want to live there. We want to try to avoid falling into despair, but if we do, we can throw ourselves upon the shelter of the everlasting arms.
Bethany, may disappointments be the springboard God uses to work deeply in our lives at this time. May every seed of disappointment fall into the ground and bring forth a harvest of joy in your family!
Bethany, I hear you and understand the disappointments. May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace. xo
I appreciate your honest words. I think some people have been quick to gloss over the disappointments of 2020 to look on the bright side. While I trust God works good in all things I think it is important to also acknowledge the disappointments and to face the feelings of loss rather than brushing them aside.
“I don’t think there is anything wrong or sinful about being disappointed, we just don’t want to live there. We want to try to avoid falling into despair, but if we do, we can throw ourselves upon the shelter of the everlasting arms”. I’m grateful for those arms for the times I’ve wallowed in disappointment.
It’s expected to be sad,
an it’s OK to pout,
but past that you’ll be breaking bad,
and you should not doubt
that the Lord’s in full control,
and in this grayscale season
when hell seems like it’s on a roll,
there’s a higher reason.
No, His ways are not our own,
and we’re horizon-bound,
but tomorrow’s seed’s been sown
and soon we will have found
that though it’s been a bitter pill,
it was for our good, not ill.
We all struggle with the word help from time to time but when we say it, breakthroughs happen and barriers are broken. Your hope is in God and he will sustain you in this time God bless fmf #4
Amen Bethany, I hear you and agree. Thank you so much for sharing…Blessings. Visit from FMF #11