If I Could Just . . . Learning the Art of Celebration

There is nothing wrong with having goals in life. But the one danger I’ve found is that we can become focused on that goal that we forget to live along the way. It’s so easy to focus on what we don’t yet have, the things we are working, and fighting for, and completely lose perspective on all we already have and have accomplished.

I’ve spent so many years of our married life thinking that if we could just get out from under student loan debt we’d be able able to breathe and live again. Except it hasn’t happened. Despite our best efforts and often doing without, we aren’t even close. In fact it’s worse. Because life happens. Job losses happen, house sales end up bringing in much less than expected. Kids ask again if we can go to the aquarium or the amusement park, and I have to say no. Worse, when my almost 10 year old offers me her piggie bank money because I’m always saying every little bit helps.

She is right, but not about the money. Every little bit does help. But what I don’t have to give in money I can give in gratitude and joy. I’ve been working on a lesson plan about the discipline of celebration. It’s been an exercise in teaching from weakness rather than strength. Even as I prepare to help facilitate the growth of others on this subject, I feel God convicting me.

The more I learn about the discipline of celebration the more I realize that our culture has gotten it so very wrong. We celebrate the individual for every micro-accomplishment. Every event is huge, over done affair often with money we don’t have to impress people we may not even like. Celebration doesn’t have to be big, expensive or social media worthy to be genuine and transformative. When I cultivate celebration I am recognizing that good things in my life that I am grateful for and the people around me, and most importantly, the good God who knits us all together.

This can be as simple as engaging with laughter and silliness with my kids when it’s been a hard day with more bills and the worry is crushing. Kids don’t understand that the cares of this life can be so very heavy. They cannot help but live in the moment. I need to grab hold of those joyful moments, even when it’s inconvenient or seems incongruous.

I have filled my life with far too many “if I could just  . . .” moments. So many that every moment that could be lived to it’s fullest has the potential to be muted. I quickly let joy drain from my life until soon what lies before me is a life of monotany and drudgery until I accomplish my goal. When it’s  big goal, like being debt free, that’s a lot of my life to be stuck in a mental and emotional holding pattern.

This not what I want! I may not be able to control my circumstances, but I can learn to control me. Learning to cultivate more positive emotions during times of difficulty has never been a strength of mine. It’s a lesson I’m learning rather unwillingly but also very necessarily.  Tonight I will eat frozen pizza with my children and talk to them at dinner about the best parts of today, even if in many ways it didn’t feel like such a good day. I will climb into bed next to my husband and remind myself of all the beautiful reasons we started our life together. I will pray words of gratitude to the God of provision and strength even when he isn’t providing the way I want.

I hope you will do the same.